a good day

Do you ever just have one of those days where you realize that you are having a good day? Nothing spectacular needs to happen, like no one big defining event, but when you reflect back on the things that happened to you, they are all good. Well today was one of those days. Reid stopped by Sotouboua on her way up north so we could travel up to Niamtougou together for our stâge Christmas fête. After waking up and making a delicious breakfast of scrambled eggs and pancakes, Reid and I spent the whole day relaxing and preparing for our trip up north. We walked out to the Route to pick up some supplies and I ran into several friends. First at the bank we ran into Mr. Kaditche, the owner of the buvette across the street from me and also the guy who works for the Ministry of Health and introduced me to everyone in the hospital. Next we stopped by the post office and I had a brief conversation with the guy who works there and he invited me to fête with him for the New Year. Next we headed to Genevieve’s, my couturiere, to get Reid’s dress fixed. On the way to the petit march we ran into Mr. Claude who works at CEFRET and he told me about the HIV/AIDS film screenings he was working on and invited me to the next film viewing. At the petit marché we picked up some vegetables and “shot-the-breeze” with my marché mama who sells me tomatoes and onions.

I know it’s silly but for the first time in Sotouboua, I feel a semblance of integration. It’s great to be stopped in the street because people know who you are and I can small talk with co-workers. I definitely have a long way before I feel “integrated” into my community but life is about baby steps right? One step at a time…

the 7 circles of hell

When Dante wrote his book Inferno describing the 7 circles of hell I think sometimes he was describing life here in Togo. Okay so not really and I think that previous statement came out offensive so strike that from the record. Anyways, here are my 7 circles of hell starting with circle #1 (or circle #7…what ever is the outer-least “hellish”-circle)

#1 – the yovo song

“yovo, yovo bon soir
Yovo yovo bon soir
Ça va? Tres bien
Il faut donner moi bon bon”*
*or something like that

This song has become the bane of my existence. Normally I don’t mind the song; you learn to tune it out, ignore it, or maybe even sing along to it. But after the 100th time it’s like geez you silly kids, I have a name and you know exactly what it is because I tell you every time. The first words that come out of your mouth do not need to be yovo (“white person” in Ewe) or anasara (Kotokoli) or ansai (Kabiyé). I know exactly what I am; I don’t need you to tell me that I’m a “white” person. Thank you for stating the obvious. Shall I state the obvious…noir(e)? It’s funny because the song really didn’t affect me at all during stâge, but since arriving at post, it has slowly come to annoy me more and more.

#2 – chickens

Chickens, roosters, “noisy, feathery and tasty” pieces of meat, etc. Whatever you call them, I think they are finally getting to me. My compound mate’s rooster never used to bug me this way but then a month ago he decided that the best place to “cock-a-doodle doo” would be right outside my bedroom window, exactly 5 minutes before my alarm is about to go off. Thankfully Marc sold the rooster after it did its job and knocked up two hens. Their several cute black, white and yellow baby chicks were cute for the first three days. Then they decide that it would be fun to replace the “cock-a-doodle-doo”-ing by my window with incessant chirping outside my window just like daddy. Not to mention coming onto my porch with mom and pooping all over my patio, stealing food from my dog and taking a bird bath in my dish-washing basin. I mean seriously, will there ever be peace and quiet in my compound? At least the baby goats give it a rest but there is something about the high-pitched squawking of chickens, reminiscent of fingernails on a chalkboard that is slowly driving me insane.

If I find 5 more circles, I’ll update the list…

three months, and then some...

Bonjour from Lomé!

Before I jump into a reflection on my first three months at post, I just wanted to start off by talking a bit about my amazing Thanksgiving dinner. In case you don’t know, Thanksgiving happens to be my holidays back in the States. What I mean by that is I’m usually the person responsible for putting the dinner together. It has become a sort of tradition between my family and two other families to celebrate thanksgiving together in Atlanta. Since me and my brother are the only ones in our group who care about the traditional American Thanksgiving dinner, and since I’m the more responsible one (sorry Nish but you know it’s true), it rests on me to gather all the supplies for our big family dinner. We’ve had some successful dinners (like the one last year I catered from Boston Market) and some unsuccessful ones (like the one three years ago where I accidentally bought non-vegetarian versions off everything from Kroger when half my family is vegetarian) but regardless, we have a lot of fun. This Thanksgiving was the first time ever that I was not there to celebrate with my family making it hard for me emotionally. Thanks to my amazing mom though, who sent me two care packages filled with some items I requested, I was able to have probably the most American Thanksgiving dinner I’ve had in a while. My mom sent me mashed potatoes, cranberry sauce, gravy, cream of mushroom soup and stuffing (you can’t really make these things in Togo feasibly). I improvised the rest of the meal from scratch: a green bean casserole, macaroni & cheese, a “pumpkin” pie (it was actually made from green papaya but tasted just like pumpkin), a coffee crumb cake, sweet corn, southern iced tea and honey butter with bread. Since I didn’t feel comfortable cooking meat in Togo, I asked my neighbour to help me purchase, kill and cook a turkey in return for an invitation to join our meal. A few other volunteers from my stâge (plus Sam) came down to Sotouboua, along with three of my homologues (Kpango, Bello and Marcus’s homologue Goslow) and we had an AMAZING meal together. Even though it wasn’t the same since I couldn’t share it with my real family, I was glad that I was able to share my holiday with my Togolese “family”.

Okay, reflection time…

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I survived my first three months at post! Woohoo! Everyone says that the first three months are the hardest and if you can get through them, you are in great shape. It’s funny because although people said the first three months were hard, they weren’t hard in the way that I thought they would be hard.

For starters, I love my house. There wasn’t a lot of adjusting going on there since I had electricity, running water and a fridge to store food. Okay, so I did have to get used to taking cold showers, which I never will, but in terms of everything else I am dealing with, it was no big deal. Second, I really like Sotouboua. The people are nice and I feel safe. True, I still don’t feel like I know a lot of people but when you live in a large town with a big population, I think it’s going to take a bit more than 3 months to feel any sort of community. I have an awesome cluster although I am still on the fence about whether or not having a site mate is good for me. Third, in general I like Togolese people and I like their culture. The “yovo song” and their constant pleas for me to help them financially certainly makes life a bit annoying but it’s nothing I can’t manage. Language issues have probably been the single biggest cultural factor that has pushed me to my limits. Dealing with a double language barrier (not knowing French and not knowing the local language) has left me sometimes regretting my decision to come to a French-speaking country but I know that even if I went to a Spanish-speaking country, I would still have to deal with a local language barrier that might prove just as exasperating. And in the long run, my French is coming, even if it is at a snail’s pace. All in all, I think that I have dealt with moving to a foreign country by myself very well, especially since I don’t have a pre-existing social support system.

Work on the other hand is another story. Out of all the factors that are supposed to make your life hard, work was the only part of my life that affected me in any way and made me want to ET several times. I had joined the Peace Corps to work. To gain public health experience, whatever that really means (although it’s hard to quantitatively measure whether I have gained enough “public health experience”, I have certainly observed and learned a lot more about health issues than I did before coming to Africa), so that when I apply to graduate schools in a few years, I can put my education in context. I did have other reasons, but like I said, I came to work. So when I found myself without any homologues, with an AIDS association on the verge of collapse, and a lack of viable work opportunities, I began to fear that I would not accomplish anything in two years and thus be unsuccessful at fulfilling my main motivation for joining the Peace Corps. Sure I had done a few events and participated in a few activities, and it was nice to have days where I could laze around and read books / watch movies / cook / etc.; however, there’s only so much free time one can have before starting to feel restless. And I felt restless a lot. Grad school requirements and a collapsing US economy had some effect on preventing me from ETing. Participating in AIDS Ride also had some effect on preventing me from ETing as I was able to put my health work in context. However my visit by Tchao, my APCD, probably had the biggest impact on my staying in country. It wasn’t as much as what he said but what he did. He was able to put me in contact with several people that Bello didn’t introduce me to that set off a chain reaction of positive outcomes. Tchao introduced me to M. Kaditche who in turn in turn introduced me to the hospital C.P.C. program and also the community health workers at the dispensaire. By finding even some work to occupy my time, not only was I finally able to get exposed to some of the public health issues I was hoping to better understand but, more importantly, I finally felt busy; something I hadn’t really felt since stâge. And busy was good. I like being busy. Busy also means that I’m getting the “experience” I need and that’s good too.
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Aside from work issues, I have spent some time self-reflecting and better understanding myself. One thing I realized is that I need to stop comparing myself to other volunteers, particularly those in my stâge, as it has been negatively affecting the way I perceive my service. I have a very bad habit of looking at what other people have or do and judge my situation against theirs. And I need to remember that every volunteer’s experience is different because each community is different and everyone comes into their service with different skill sets. It has taken me a while to realize that I wasn’t doing less work than some of the other volunteers during my first three months; instead, I was merely at a different starting point. Some volunteers like Mitch and Kristina and Rayan came into Togo and had enough French to start working pretty much immediately; since I came in with not a lot of French, I needed to start with French and as my French picks up, my work should pick up too. Some volunteers did not have issues with homologues the way I did so they were able to jump into projects while I had to spend time making new contacts and finding new work. Additionally, since it’s much easier to feel part of a community when you are in a small village, some volunteers appeared to have integrated into their posts more rapidly than I did; however, being in a fairly large town, it’s unlikely I’ll ever feel the sense of community and family those volunteers feel, at least for a while. Finally, I have to remember that I have a lot of things going for me because unlike other volunteers, I have a site mate so I don’t have to deal with the loneliness that some volunteers feel, and unlike other volunteers, I have access to electricity and running water so I don’t have to deal with the hassle that some volunteers feel by not having access to those utilities. In the end, by comparing myself to other volunteers and feeling like a failure, I am not going to improve my own situation. All I can do is deal with the situation I am in and use the resources around me to move forward.

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So that’s my reflection on my time in Togo so far. I am in Lomé right now for the new stâge swear-in and to do a little bit of grocery shopping for post. Tomorrow I head back to Sotouboua and it’s off-to-work-I-go getting Vie Saine back in shape and jumping into my new projects with the mother’s club and the national malaria campaign. I’m glad things have picked up and I look forward to seeing where my service takes me in the next few months…

Till next time,
- Nikhil

P.S. Thanks to Megan Kelly for the awesome postcard! Hope you get mine soon and look forward to planning your mid-service vacation in West Africa :) Also thanks to everyone who responded to my personal e-mails (Kasey Kask, Benji White, etc.) and messaged me on Facebook (Anu, Matt Ward, etc.). It’s good to know what’s going on in your lives even though I can’t be there…

P.P.S. Seriously Georgia Tech? Seriously! Why did you have to wait till I left not only Atlanta but the continent before FINALLY kicking U(sic)GA in the ass? Seriously?!? The worst part is that I can’t even gloat to anyone in country. Do you not realize how unsatisfying this makes the win? Funny enough, I sort of knew this would happen…

le systéme scolaire au togo

As part of the whole Peace Corps goal #3 (something to the effect of sharing Togolese life and culture with the American people), here is my attempt at explaining the Togolese school system. Since Togo was once a French colony, many French systems were adopted by Togo after independence; therefore the Togolese school system is apparently the same as the French school system. For those of you unaware of the French system, here is a brief summary:

The Togolese school system consists of 13 levels. Children begin their education at the age of 6. There are many public & private jardin d’enfants (kindergarten) schools for children under 6 but those are mainly for the upper economic classes that can afford to start their education early. Most children start their schooling at the E.P.P. level (école primaire publique) or basically elementary school; the second “p” could also be private, catholic, muslim, etc. The elementary school level consists of 6 levels: CP1 (cours préparatoire), CP2, CE1 (cours élementaire), CE2, CM1 (cours moyen), and CM2. After finishing CM2, students take the CEPD exam and have to pass in order to move onto the “middle school”.

Middle school or the C.E.G. consists of 4 years of schooling: 6eme, 5eme, 4eme and 3eme. I’m not sure why but starting in middle school, the grades move backwards (6eme à 5eme à etc.). During elementary school, your classes are pretty much fixed; however during middle school you get a little leeway and are allowed to pick and choose certain classes based on what direction you want your education to take. After finishing 3eme, all students must pass the BEPC exam to move onto “high school”. If you don’t pass the BEPC, you can take it again (but you have to pay for it again) and many students take it several times explaining why there can be an age gap greater than 1 between the youngest and oldest student in the 3eme level.

High school, or lycée, consists of 3 years of school: 2eme, 1er and Terminale. If a student is likely to stop their education, it usually takes place either after C.E.G. or during one of the years at lycée. By this point in their education, the student has typically selected the career path of their (or their parent’s) choice and narrows down his or her education to a few select topics related to that field. The two most popular routes are science (for something in the medical field perhaps) and language (for something in the education field, particularly to become an English teacher). Unlike elementary and middle school, lycée students take 2 exams, the BAC1 after the 1er level and the BAC2 after Terminale level.

As for after high school, university options are limited to the University of Lomé and the University of Kara. We did not learn too much regarding the university system so I can’t tell you much more. However, it’s much cheaper than college in the US (then again, most colleges outside the US are lol). Lycée students seem to be obsessed with going to school abroad (which probably speaks to the quality of education one can receive at the university level in Togo). A few try to study in Europe and many try to study in the US; however due to the difficulty in getting a US visa in Togo, very few but the very wealthy can afford that. Interesting fact though is that President Faure actually received his undergraduate degree from George Washington University (hmm Shilpa, I wonder if your Togolese roommate knew him then? lol…).

Unlike the US, schooling is not mandatory and is not free. Well let me rephrase that: just recently the Togolese Ministry of Education decreed that schooling at the elementary school level (E.P.P, etc.) should be free in an attempt to abide by the UN Millennium Development Goals. Therefore schooling from the C.E.G. level and upwards is not free and definitely not mandatory. Yet, the whole situation of paying for one’s education and not making it mandatory brings up a plethora of questions.

First of all, is free elementary schooling going to do anything to help Togo? By making elementary schools free, but not making them mandatory, children who aren’t going to school will not attend, even if they had the money. From another angle, since 1 in 3 children are unregistered by the government (yes, that is a fairly accurate fact which makes it all the more shocking!) even if elementary school was free and mandatory, the government can’t make someone go to school if they don’t exist to the government. From yet another angle, how does making sure children complete an elementary education, or 6 years of education, do anything for Togo? Is 6 years of education worth anything? Finally, even if elementary schooling is free and mandatory, doesn’t it make sense that more students would not continue at the middle school level when schooling gets harder thereby making the ministry of education decree pretty much inconsequential?

Second of all by charging for schooling above the elementary level, it would seem that economic selection would take place and only those who can afford to school would continue. First of all boys would be more likely to continue over girls (being in a patriarchal society, girls are more likely to drop out of school to take care of her family, work to earn money, etc…hence Togo’s need for the GEE program!). Second of all, even if boys continue their education, that’s no sign that they will complete their studies due to failing the super hard exams (trust me they are hard, I’ve seen a copy and even I don’t understand all the questions and part of the exam is in English). Then again, even if the boys finish high school, that’s no guarantee that they will go to college. And since college is definitely not free and can take anywhere from four (for a general degree) to eleven (for a medical degree), that’s a lot of money to invest in one’s education. If only the upper economic groups can afford that much education, an economic wormhole will appear that would tend to favour the rich continuing their education and continuing to hold the most specialized jobs while the poorer economic groups continue to hold the more general positions such as those working for the government. And there is definitely no such thing as financial aid from the government, especially not for college (however college is considerably cheaper here in Togo than the US).

Education is valued in the US because it is only through education that people have an opportunity to move upwards through the socioeconomic classes. A classic rags-to-riches story, you can be poor, get a good education, find a good job and then enter the middle class. However if being poor in Togo, keeps you poor in Togo due to financial restrictions on your education, then there is no hope for upward mobility. No hope for economic mobility leads to economic stagnation. Hmm, did I just equate all of Togo’s economic problems to its system of education? Umm a speculative maybe?...I’m not saying that the ministry shouldn’t be applauded for the positive steps it is taking to follow the MDGs; it’s more a question of what is the REAL effect the new policy has on improving life in Togo?

(BTW another interesting note, the school calendar was pushed back two weeks due to the flooding issues in the southern part of the country; last year when major flooding occurred in the Savannes region, schools all over the country started 1 month late. Unlike the US, when weather-related issues affect one large area in Togo, all the schools throughout the country are shut down.)

If you have any questions about anything specific to life in Togo, please don’t hesitate to send me a message and I’ll gladly do my best to educate.

- Nikhil

roller coaster-ing

hey y’all,

When they said you’ll experience your “highest highs and lowest lows” they really weren’t kidding! I apologize for not having posting in over a month but the past few weeks have been a roller coaster of emotions. Not so much with adjusting to life here in Togo, as I am feeling pretty well “adjusted”, but a series of good and bad events have been seriously playing with my mental state. One moment something amazing is happening and I am on top of the world; the next moment and something is dragging me down to the ground. Let’s go back a few weeks and watch the Ferris wheel of my life spin…

September 13th: I finally attended my first VST meeting in Sotouboua. Every month on the second Saturday, all the members gather to discuss various issues from updates by the administrative bureau to discussing the role nutrition plays in keeping one’s CD4 count high. It was great to finally meet many of the members whom I had not met before; it was also the first Togolese run meeting that I had attended so it was interesting to watch the group dynamics of how they facilitate. Although the meeting started off as a “high”, it slowly progressed into a big “low” when two events transpired during the meeting. First of all, Fortuné, my official homologue who works as a lab technician at the hospital and was also one of the founding members of Vie Saine announced that he was being “affectée-d” (or transferred) to Kpalimé. As a government worker, people are constantly being affectée-d to various parts of the country to meet the needs of those communities; no one really has a choice because you either move or you get fired. Since working “for the government” (technically) is probably one of the best and most stable jobs one can find in Togo, everyone pretty much does as they are told. Anyways, with Fortuné being transferred to another part of the country, at least 6 hours away, this poses a problem for Vie Saine since he was not only a driving force in the community for HIV/AIDS advocacy but also as the lab technician, he was aware of the HIV status of any person in the community who got tested. Losing Fortuné is a huge loss for VST.

Second, after Fortuné’s announcement, a fight breaks out between Bello, my other homologue and also the Executive Director of VST, and the members. Due to a misunderstanding in communication and in how exchange rates work, the members accused Bello and Fortuné of “bouff-ing” (stealing) money; this is apparently a huge problem and something we as PCVs need to watch out for when planning projects. The misunderstanding occurred because the previous month, a Spanish group of volunteers (led by Fortuné’s brother who lives in Spain) visited VST and donated about 200 Euros and a bunch of old clothes. The members misunderstood and thought the group had donated 200.000 CFA which is a very different amount (200 Euros is about 150.000 CFA). Even though the admin bureau tried to explain the situation, things got heated. I think this is where some other issues came into play such as Bello being Nigerian and untrustworthy (they REALLY HATE Nigerians not just here in Togo but in Africa in general apparently…If you call someone a Nigerian, it’s a HUGE insult!) and I think someone was called a whore but since at this point the group switched to a mixture of French and Kabiyé, I was totally lost (most of the drama that I am discussing is part what I was able to understand and part what Bello explained to me the next day in a post-meeting recap). Anyways, drama drama drama and next thing I know Bello is announcing that he is resigning. So now I’m left with zero homologues.

Oh and to top it all off, instead of saving that money that was donated by the Spanish group and putting it towards developing projects for VST, the bureau decides to donate the money out to all the individual members which turns out to be very little (each members received between 3.000 and 5.000 CFA which is between $6-$10). This substantially decreases the amount of money VST has to work with for the upcoming months.

So basically in one meeting, I find out that I am losing both of my homologues and that my AIDS association is pretty much broke. Fan-freaking-tastic...

September 18th: Tami from Tchamba meets me in Sokodé to present me with the cutest puppy ever: Swarley! During post visit, Tami was asking around to see if anyone wanted to get one of the new puppies from her compound. Since I had always wanted a dog and mom can’t stop me since I’m on a different continent, I agreed and Tami gave me the puppy and all her old dog supplies for free. Score! Definite “high” as I FINALLY get to own a puppy! Should be interesting…

September 27th: My phone is stolen in the Sotouboua marché. I was running around in the late afternoon picking up some soja and tomatoes for dinner when I reach into the outside pocket of my bag and discover that my phone is gone. I try retracing my steps and frantically search the marché and my house for it but can’t find it. After locating Marcus and having him call my phone, I discover that it has been turned off which means that it was definitely stolen. So now I have to go to Sokodé to get a new phone…I also receive word through Marcus that Taressa has decided to ET (early terminate) and that Krissy is contemplating ETing as well. Definite “low”…

Oct. 1st: I head to Pagala and then Atakpamé to participate in the CREJE training of trainers (TOT) for a new OEV club based on the AED-Kara Club Espoir model. It was awesome to not only see my volunteer friends in the Plateaux Region but great to play with kids for a weekend. I want to start a similar project in Sotouboua through Vie Saine so it was good to learn about kids clubs and to know that I have support from the Atakpamé crew. Big “high”…

On the other hand I find out Allison has already ETed and quiet Mikey is about to ET. There must be something is the Peace Corps water cooler because quiet Mikey makes him the 4th person to ET within a span of 2 weeks from our stage. “Low”…

October 8th: I help out with a dépistage at the Sotouboua hospital that is co-sponsored by VST. It’s nice to feel productive. Fortune let’s me sit in on some pre- and post- test counseling sessions with patients so I get exposed to HIV testing and counseling. “High”…

October 11th: Reid wants to have a big party for her birthday and cook jambalaya so I offer my house since it’s made for hosting large parties. It’s nice to have people over at my house and show off how amazing it is. Also great that I get to see a bunch of my friends from around the country and hear about their experiences at post so far. Of course with our group things get ridiculous as usual, but in a good “reminds-me-of-training” way. Big “high”…However it’s a “low” as this is the last time (for who knows how long) I’ll see Taressa and Krissy (who officially decides to ET). It’s bittersweet b/c although I get to see them before they leave, it doesn’t make it any easier to say goodbye to two good friends.

Krissy leaving has been one of the hardest emotional blows the past few months. When we come to Togo, we leave everyone behind, family and friends. We are thrust together very suddenly in a foreign environment so emotional bonds between people typically form rapidly and with great strength. What we create is our own close knit circle of friends who become our “family” in Togo. When Krissy ET’d, it broke a strong emotional bond and left the sort of gap in our family the way it would be if you were to lose a cousin you were close to. I have created several strong friendships with many people, inside and outside my stâge and Krissy just happened to be the person I felt closest too. No rhyme or reason and I don’t even know if she felt as close to me as I did to her. And there was nothing romantic there; she was just someone who I felt understood who I was and where I was coming from. We had several things in common but most importantly of all, I trusted her, which is a big deal because it usually takes me a while to trust anyone having had my trust broken several times in the past. I mean I know she made the right decision and I only really care that she’s happy back in the US, but it’s still shitty to lose one of the few people who you really click with. So Krissy, it sucks that you are gone but know that you are very much missed…

So yea, as you can see the past four weeks have been tough. It’s funny because they haven’t been tough in the way that everyone else said the first few months are tough. I was totally not expecting this. But it’s happened and I’m dealing with it. It’ll take time to figure out where to go from here but hey, I have 2 years right?

*sigh*
- Nikhil

P.S. Shout out to Andrew DeRussy, Dustin Hipp & Michael Lindsey for sending me e-mails/facebook messages. Much appreciated guys. They definitely made my day…