There are two inherent problems with keeping a blog: writing and posting
1) writing: when I want to write, I don’t have my computer in front of me; when I have my computer in front of me, I don’t want to write. Most of my observations happen when I am actually outside, experiencing Africa and all that “being-in-the-moment” crap. It’s hard to do that when you are stuck in front of a computer. An existential dilemma. How can you experience life and write about it at the same time? Sometimes I feel like it would be easier for me to write if I could attach electrodes to my brain that would send signals to my blog so it would record what I’m thinking and seeing and feeling and I can compose on-the-go without having to be tied down to a table, chair, computer and outlet. For example, most of what I am writing here was actually composed in my head earlier today as I was walking down a back road to the Sokodé marché; it just took me some time to actually finish my shopping and get to a computer on time to compile this.
I am a chaotic writer. I write how I think, which is disjointed and all-over-the-place. I write one sentence, write another sentence, go back and write something in between, write the final sentence before going back and re-writing the second sentence. I can’t help it because it’s the way I’ve always written. If I were to try and write the way my 8th grade English teacher wanted me to (intro, body 1, body 2, body 3, conclusion) I would have the writing style of a 5th grader. And trust me, I’ve tried to write consecutively but all it does is put me in a box and that’s not the way my mind works thereby reducing my ability to write well by several factors. I know it’s stupid but I really am an “organic” writer, whatever that really means. Witty and sophisticated “perfect” sentences occur spontaneously in my head and if I don’t write them down immediately, I am forever haunted by what I could have said. As I desperately try to remember how the perfect sentence sounded, I end up with something sub-standard but what will have to do since that perfect sentence is gone and never to return again. The product you are reading right now has undergone many changes (over the course of several days to several weeks) and sounds nowhere near as perfect as it should have sounded had I been able to write this posting at the moment of it’s conception.
2) posting: when I want to post, I don’t have access to the internet; when I have access to the internet, I don’t have my USB drive with all my blogs on it to post. It’s impossible to sit in a cyber café and write my blogs for 2 main reasons. First of all, it’s not economical to write up a blog at a cyber café as you have to pay to use the computers and the internet. Secondly, I only really get good access to the internet about once a week (until recently, but I’m getting ahead of myself…) so that means that if I wrote my blogs at the CIB, I would have to wait to write blogs affecting the quality of writing due to a distortion of memory that occurs. That’s just not practical; thus I am restricted to writing at home on my laptop and transferring my postings via USB keys which leads to the aforementioned problem of not having access to the internet at the precise moment that I want to use it.
This is no where close to saying that this is the end of my blog though. I plan to keep this blog my entire two years, and even some time afterwards (I mean it’s good to reflect back on what I experienced after I’m back in America). I’m just trying to explain/justify why my blog is the way it is and why it has taken me several months to post blogs from September and onwards. Why I feel the need to explain myself to you, my readers? I have no idea. Is there anything you can do to help me maintain my blogging momentum? Unfortunately, no. I will say though since now that I have free access to internet (albeit slow and sporadic access) at PLAN, who opened up a new informatique center, about 1km away from my house 5 days a week, I have less of an excuse to not blog in a timely manner. Hmm, I smell another New Year’s resolution…
Till the next time I write (and post and have access to the internet and happen to have my USB key with me), ciao!
-Nikhil
P.S. Thanks Jess for the amazing letter, article and CD of music. You rock! Shout outs also go to Christina, Katie (sorry your letter got lost, silly Togo postal service!), Anu, and Patrick who have responded to my e-mails over the past few weeks. Oh and thanks Megan for the picture of us in Philly!
1) writing: when I want to write, I don’t have my computer in front of me; when I have my computer in front of me, I don’t want to write. Most of my observations happen when I am actually outside, experiencing Africa and all that “being-in-the-moment” crap. It’s hard to do that when you are stuck in front of a computer. An existential dilemma. How can you experience life and write about it at the same time? Sometimes I feel like it would be easier for me to write if I could attach electrodes to my brain that would send signals to my blog so it would record what I’m thinking and seeing and feeling and I can compose on-the-go without having to be tied down to a table, chair, computer and outlet. For example, most of what I am writing here was actually composed in my head earlier today as I was walking down a back road to the Sokodé marché; it just took me some time to actually finish my shopping and get to a computer on time to compile this.
I am a chaotic writer. I write how I think, which is disjointed and all-over-the-place. I write one sentence, write another sentence, go back and write something in between, write the final sentence before going back and re-writing the second sentence. I can’t help it because it’s the way I’ve always written. If I were to try and write the way my 8th grade English teacher wanted me to (intro, body 1, body 2, body 3, conclusion) I would have the writing style of a 5th grader. And trust me, I’ve tried to write consecutively but all it does is put me in a box and that’s not the way my mind works thereby reducing my ability to write well by several factors. I know it’s stupid but I really am an “organic” writer, whatever that really means. Witty and sophisticated “perfect” sentences occur spontaneously in my head and if I don’t write them down immediately, I am forever haunted by what I could have said. As I desperately try to remember how the perfect sentence sounded, I end up with something sub-standard but what will have to do since that perfect sentence is gone and never to return again. The product you are reading right now has undergone many changes (over the course of several days to several weeks) and sounds nowhere near as perfect as it should have sounded had I been able to write this posting at the moment of it’s conception.
2) posting: when I want to post, I don’t have access to the internet; when I have access to the internet, I don’t have my USB drive with all my blogs on it to post. It’s impossible to sit in a cyber café and write my blogs for 2 main reasons. First of all, it’s not economical to write up a blog at a cyber café as you have to pay to use the computers and the internet. Secondly, I only really get good access to the internet about once a week (until recently, but I’m getting ahead of myself…) so that means that if I wrote my blogs at the CIB, I would have to wait to write blogs affecting the quality of writing due to a distortion of memory that occurs. That’s just not practical; thus I am restricted to writing at home on my laptop and transferring my postings via USB keys which leads to the aforementioned problem of not having access to the internet at the precise moment that I want to use it.
This is no where close to saying that this is the end of my blog though. I plan to keep this blog my entire two years, and even some time afterwards (I mean it’s good to reflect back on what I experienced after I’m back in America). I’m just trying to explain/justify why my blog is the way it is and why it has taken me several months to post blogs from September and onwards. Why I feel the need to explain myself to you, my readers? I have no idea. Is there anything you can do to help me maintain my blogging momentum? Unfortunately, no. I will say though since now that I have free access to internet (albeit slow and sporadic access) at PLAN, who opened up a new informatique center, about 1km away from my house 5 days a week, I have less of an excuse to not blog in a timely manner. Hmm, I smell another New Year’s resolution…
Till the next time I write (and post and have access to the internet and happen to have my USB key with me), ciao!
-Nikhil
P.S. Thanks Jess for the amazing letter, article and CD of music. You rock! Shout outs also go to Christina, Katie (sorry your letter got lost, silly Togo postal service!), Anu, and Patrick who have responded to my e-mails over the past few weeks. Oh and thanks Megan for the picture of us in Philly!
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